Laughs were in short supply for many this year.
But for those in need of a chuckle, one needed to look no further than The Item‘s police log, where many of the year’s lowlights were chronicled.
Here are some of our favorite entries of 2020.
As we head into 2021, let’s all hope for a much more lighthearted year.
To the police, thank you for all that you do.
Marblehead, Jan. 3
A Carol Road caller reported she cannot use her yard due to the abundance of wild turkeys in the area and the droppings they leave behind. The caller was directed to call Mass Wildlife.
Nahant, Jan. 12
The station received a walk-in visit at 12:20 p.m. Sunday from a man seeking to file a complaint against his neighbor, whom the man said has a rooster that began crowing early that morning. The man also stated the rooster had not stopped for two hours and said this has gone on for approximately two weeks. An officer spoke with the neighbor, who agreed the rooster had been exceptionally loud as of late and said he was in the process of finding a suitable home for him.
Marblehead, Jan. 14
A caller reported a man was in a wheelchair in the street with all of his “worldly possessions” at 10:31 a.m. Tuesday at Tedesco and Humphrey streets. An officer spoke with the man, who was in a power chair. He had nothing with him and was dressed appropriately for the weather.
Marblehead, Jan. 15
A report of religious solicitors at 10:08 a.m. Wednesday on Hereford Road. A caller reported a woman came to the door and was preaching the gospel. The caller asked to see the woman’s license and the woman relayed that she wasn’t doing anything wrong. The caller said the woman wanted to “hand me some religious (expletive) thing” and asked police if that was allowed. The caller was told it was.
Nahant, Jan. 22
A report of suspicious activity at 8:19 p.m. Wednesday at Nahant Road and Little Nahant Road. A person was reportedly slumped over a bench. An officer reported locating the man, who was playing Angry Birds on his phone.
Swampscott, Feb. 19
A report of suspicious activity at 2:28 p.m. Wednesday at Train Depot at 10 Railroad Ave. A caller reported a male was swinging nunchucks around the train platform. The caller said he had been there for about 15 minutes and that nobody else was around.
Marblehead, March 16
A caller reported there was someone in the middle of the road at Ocean Avenue and Pleasant Street “herding the turkeys across the street” at 7:19 p.m. Monday. The caller said the woman had parked her car in the middle of the road to do so. Police reported the turkeys were safely across the street and there were no cars in the middle of the road.
Marblehead, March 20
A report of a turkey creating havoc at 10:36 a.m. Friday at Baldwin Road and Pleasant Street. Police reported there was no wildlife around.
Marblehead, March 20
A report of leaf blowers blowing the coronavirus at 1:50 p.m. Friday on Gerry Street. An anonymous caller reported she was furious because someone was using a leaf blower and blowing particles from one house to the next. She went on to explain how stupid it was. Police told the woman that they don’t police stupidity and that there are no laws against leaf blowers. She was told to contact the health department about her concerns about airborne COVID-19 particles.
Peabody, March 23
A report of suspicious activity at 1:12 a.m. Monday at 200 Lynn St. A caller reported a woman was slumped at the wheel. Police reported the woman was just trying to catch Pokemon. She was trying to catch ’em all.
Lynnfield, April 5
A report of a suspicious person at 2:55 p.m. Sunday on Wildewood Drive. A caller reported a person in an Easter Bunny costume was hopping around on Wildewood Drive. Police checked the area, but could not find the Easter Bunny.
Nahant, April 7
An unknown caller at 1:14 p.m. Tuesday reported that pigs had been out squealing all day near Valley Road. An officer made contact with the owner of the pigs and determined two of the three were making noise. Those two pigs were brought inside. The third pig remained sleeping outside.
Nahant, April 19
A caller reported a sign had gone missing from his property and that his neighbor’s farm animals were causing traffic issues at 3:56 p.m. Sunday on Valley Road.
Marblehead, April 24
A report of screaming at 9:56 p.m. Friday on Green Street. A caller reported there was some sort of screaming going on in the area. Police reported the person was out praying “for us” and would bring it in for the night.
Lynnfield, May 23
A report of a suspicious person at 12:17 a.m. Saturday at 3 Suntaug St. A caller reported he saw someone crawl into his neighbors’ window. Police reported it was the neighbor’s teenage son who was returning home.
Peabody, May 31
A report of suspicious activity at 9:05 p.m. Sunday at 11 Butternut Ave. A caller reported her children told her about a strange man who was in the neighborhood. Police reported the elderly gentleman comes down the street to take a walk around the reservoir.
Marblehead, June 3
A report of vegetables left at the door at 2:25 p.m. Wednesday on Middle Street. A caller reported a box of vegetables was left at his door, but he did not know who left it there. He said the box contained a “handsome bag of apples.”
Marblehead, June 5
A report of a naked person in the streets at Atlantic and Clifton avenues at 4:29 a.m. Saturday.
Marblehead, June 24
An ongoing neighbor dispute was reported at 8:59 a.m. Wednesday on Powder House Court. A caller reported her “80-something-year-old neighbor hit her in the head with her cane over a garden hose.” She declined the need for medical attention. Police reported there was an ongoing dispute between the parties and they are currently working with the Housing Authority to rectify the situation.
Marblehead, June 28
A naked homeless man was reportedly sunning himself at 9:55 a.m. Sunday on Ocean Avenue. Police could not locate anyone in the area and spoke to a few people who reported they had not seen anything either.
Nahant, July 1
A report of an elderly couple trying to steal a man’s bicycle at Forty Steps Beach on Nahant Road at 8:13 p.m. Wednesday.
Saugus, July 3
A report of a suspicious person at 3:38 p.m. Friday at 18 Richard St. A caller reported she saw a man jump into a home through a window. Police spoke with the resident who said their services were not necessary.
Marblehead, July 16
A report of a disturbance at 5:35 p.m. Thursday on South Street. A caller reported a man was out back yelling and screaming while wearing a cape. Police reported the man was wearing a sheet and went back inside. He did not want help or to talk.
Peabody, July 25
A report of suspicious activity at 1:57 p.m. Saturday at City Hall at 24 Lowell St. A caller was concerned about someone having a lemonade stand near City Hall.
Peabody, July 25
A report of a disturbance at 9:36 p.m. Saturday at Hampton Inn at 59 Newbury St. A caller reported a guest was becoming aggressive with the staff. He reportedly ripped off his shirt and left. Police reported the person had left before their arrival.
Peabody, July 28
A caller reported a possible UFO sighting in the sky at 10:57 p.m. Tuesday at Duddy’s Liquors at 134 Newbury St. Police reported there was no UFO in the air at this time.
Saugus, Aug. 5
A 911 caller reported a disturbance between him and his neighbor on Summit Road at 11:50 p.m. Wednesday. The caller admitted to punching his neighbor in the face for urinating on his driveway. Dispatched officers reported requesting an ambulance for evaluation. One party was reportedly taken into protective custody.
Peabody, Aug. 8
Suspicious activity was reported at 3:10 p.m. Saturday at 2 Granite St. and 286 Washington St. A caller reported a man was defecating by the brook. Police spoke with the man who was fishing in the area. He had soiled himself and was going home for the day.
Saugus, Aug. 12
A 911 caller at 7:32 p.m. Wednesday reported she was engaged in a verbal argument with the staff of Border Cafe on Broadway over the caller’s check. Officers were dispatched and determined the argument was over the confiscation of a margarita. Peace was restored.
Saugus, Aug. 13
A caller reported motor vehicle vandalism at 5:12 p.m. Thursday at Burger King at 1449 Broadway. He reported a burger was thrown on his vehicle.
Marblehead, Aug. 15
An anonymous report of kids screaming in the street on Mitchell Street at 10:46 p.m. Saturday. Police found three children playing flashlight tag with a mother nearby.
Saugus, Aug. 18
A woman called the station at 4:30 p.m. Tuesday to report she believed she was being harassed by her neighbor. An officer was dispatched to Laurel Gardens and reported speaking with the caller, who told him the neighbor was playing loud tribal, drum-style music in her apartment and deliberately sat outside when she came home with her groceries.
Marblehead, Aug. 26
A report of vandalism to a sign at 6:23 a.m. Wednesday on Ocean Avenue. A caller reported at programmable sign at Devereux Beach has been broken and now reads “God is gay.” The highway department was notified and the sign was switched back to its original message.
Marblehead, Aug. 30
A caller reported her neighbor was putting an outside shower right under her kitchen window at 12:03 p.m. Sunday on Auburndale Road. She thought it was sneaky to install the shower during the weekend while she was away. Police said an officer could respond to observe the work, but since it was not a crime, the caller should contact the building department.
Peabody, Aug. 29
A report of a disturbance at 7:09 p.m. Saturday at 14 Foster St. A caller reported an intoxicated neighbor was yelling in the hallways and slapping people. Police reported the incident was related to an ongoing neighbor dispute.
Peabody, Aug. 31
A report of a neighborhood dispute at 6:20 p.m. Monday at 1 Mayfair Road. A caller reported her neighbor came out and dumped a bucket of water on her dog, who had been barking in the yard. Police reported both parties declined their harassment order rights. The incident was documented and forwarded to the animal control officer.
Saugus, Sept. 10
Police received a call at 10:14 p.m. Thursday from a Baker Street Apartments resident who stated a person who lives in the building knocked on her door and asked for a cup of sugar. The caller stated she did not answer the door and the neighbor proceeded to go across the hall to ask the same thing. The caller stated she was in fear of the neighbor. Dispatched officers spoke with the caller and determined the neighbor did not do anything illegal.
Peabody, Sept. 19
A report of suspicious activity at 3:57 a.m. Saturday at 14 Bartholomew St. A caller reported she could hear a man playing a saxophone in the middle of the street, but had lost sight of him. Police reported the concert had ended for the night.
Saugus, Sept, 19
A report of a neighborhood dispute at 2:25 p.m. Saturday at 4 Indian Rock Drive. A caller reported an ongoing issue that involved neighbors throwing objects, including dog feces, into her backyard. Police reported the neighbors would work it out on their own.
Swampscott, Sept. 22
A report of a neighbor problem at 3:17 p.m. Tuesday at 6 Cherry Court. A caller reported her neighbor had walked by and flipped her off in an effort to antagonize her.
Marblehead, Sept. 24
A report of two people playing music at 7:17 p.m. Thursday on Front Street. A caller reported two people were down at the Landing playing annoying music and he did not think they had an entertainment license to be performing there. The caller said they were playing bongo drums and an electric guitar.
Saugus, Oct. 14
Police received a report at 6:13 p.m. Wednesday about a male dancing around a gray vehicle with the trunk up and his clothes off in the parking lot of Target on the Lynn Fells Parkway. Dispatched officers were unable to locate any person matching the description.
Marblehead, Oct. 16
A caller reported that their daughter was smashing the car in their driveway with a meat tenderizer at 4:37 p.m. Friday. The daughter’s hand was injured in the incident and she was transported to Salem Hospital.
Peabody, Oct. 22
Police received a call at 11:47 p.m. Thursday from a resident of Garden Road who reported her roommate had “snuck in” a male guest who was unknown to her. The caller reported she did not feel safe with a stranger in the home while she was trying to sleep. Police report the matter was solved and no further information was given.
Peabody, Oct. 31
A report of suspicious activity at 4:29 p.m. Saturday at Advanced Automotive Concepts at 55R Walnut St. Police reported all was in order. The reported smoke had been part of a Halloween wedding photography shoot.
Marblehead, Nov. 4
A man called to report that something had happened to his clocks and asked for the official time. It was 8:46 a.m.
Peabody, Nov. 20
A caller reported a squirrel was running around the guest bedroom at 7:22 p.m. Friday at 10 Bourbon St. An officer reported the animal was a bat, which was released.
Peabody, Nov. 21
A larceny was reported at 2:42 p.m. Saturday at 3 Gaywood Circle. A caller reported a pumpkin was stolen from her mother’s front stoop. Officers went to check the area in an attempt to squash the theft of local gourds.
Saugus, Nov. 22
A report of vandalism at 8:35 a.m. Sunday at 87 Hurd Ave. A caller reported someone threw a ketchup bottle at her window, which caused damage.
Marblehead, Dec. 18
A caller reported that kids were throwing snowballs at their house at 7:30 p.m. Friday. The culprits had left upon the arrival of the police.
Marblehead, Dec. 31
A report by a concerned citizen Thursday at 6:16 a.m. on Beacon Street. The caller reported that she was on her daily walk and could not tell if another person had waved back at her. The person was contacted and reported he was well and was waiting for the sun to rise.