I want to be as transparent about this as I can. My son is an Eagle Scout. He and my wife are members of several Boy Scout committees in Lynn and the North Shore.
Andrew has worked at, and even run, Boy Scout day camps (I’ve been on the staff of some of them). And I am a merit badge counselor. Our activities have involved Lynn, Swampscott, Saugus, Lynnfield, Peabody and other communities in the area.
Scouting has been a major part of our lives ever since Andrew was a little boy. There were Cub Scouts, week-long sessions at Camp Onway and Camp Lonetree in New Hampshire (my son worked a summer up at Onway), overnight campouts, Cub Overnight Weekends (COW) … you name the activity, and one of us has experienced it at least once.
We have a large social circle consisting mainly of scouters, and two of our closest friends were, for a long time, even more involved than we were.
Both my son and my wife have been honored with district-wide awards for their service to scouting on several occasions. I’ve watched it all and I won’t lie. I am tremendously proud of both of them for their accomplishments.
So when I say I am beyond dismayed at reports that there have been more than 92,000 charges made against the scouts for sexual abuse, I mean exactly that. I am crushed. And I say that because in all the time I’ve had involvement in scouting, there was only one case where someone connected to it was convicted of sexual abuse, and that was Chris Reardon, who is currently serving a 40-year sentence after pleading guilty of numerous counts.
Three of the organizations I’ve been most involved with have seen their troubles in this regard. I’ve seen Little League coaches and officials convicted. The issues the Catholic Church has had with sexual abuse have been widely documented. And while there’s always the real danger of adults with sinister intentions infiltrating organizations that cater to kids, finding out that there have been 92,000 alleged incidents of it over the period of time covered by the Boy Scouts of America’s bankruptcy case is extremely tough to digest.
I don’t know what to say. I’ve sat through more sessions, run by the Boy Scouts, on protecting children than I can count. I have learned about two-deep leadership, which requires that no adult can ever be alone with kids in an official capacity. This means that if you have to take a child home from a meeting, which is often the case, two adult leaders have to go.
I remember the summer my son had turned 18 but his friend was still 17. They went on a troop campout and because of the rules, they couldn’t be tent mates. Andrew, who was 18, was an adult. The other kid wasn’t. And it didn’t matter that they were best friends. Those were the rules.
So it isn’t as if these organizations don’t know what’s going on. They all know. I can say, with a lifetime of experience, that people like me (and there are a lot of them) are eternally vigilant about this stuff.
I used to get suspicious if adults in these youth groups spent too much of their free time with kids. I’ve been a staff member for a few camps. And after a day of chasing kids around, the evening get-togethers, which usually involved a trip to Dunkin Donuts for refreshments (nothing harder than a good cup of coffee, by the way), were just for the grown-ups. The last thing you wanted to do is be with the kids on your off time. So red flags go up in my eyes when I see adults who get too chummy with kids.
In seven years of Little League coaching, I only took the team out for ice cream once, and that was because the parents urged me to do it. I told them I would, but only if they all took their own kids to the place. I didn’t even want to be in a position where I could be accused.
The idea of 92,000 sex abuse accusations turns my stomach. And that’s because scouts, like a lot of other youth-based organizations, tend to draw a lot of kids who need real emotional support and validation. The thought of anyone abusing that vulnerability is absolutely repugnant.
But I feel for the organization too, because it really tries to prevent this. I can’t speak for what it was like 50 years ago, but I can speak for what it’s been like for the 30-plus years I’ve been a scout dad, merit badge counselor and Eagle sponsor. I’ve never worked with anyone who, in my eyes at least, didn’t have the best interests of the kids in their hearts.
Those who have sullied this group’s reputation by abusing children are the ones who make you pray fervently that there is a hell, because they deserve to be in the deepest, darkest, hottest fire pit.