Brotherton: Flipping out over new-fangled phones

My ancient flip phone finally died, joining other superannuated relics like pagers and floppy discs in my technology graveyard. Every time I turned it on, even after a full charge, the "powering down" warning beeped and the screen went dark. I suppose I could look on eBay or some site where a battery gathering dust in a warehouse somewhere is available for purchase.

Or, I could boldly enter the 21st century and buy my first smartphone. 

I really can't complain. The "advanced and compact" silver Verizon LG model VX3300 cell phone served me well. It's a real oldie, dating back to about 1775, the same model Paul Revere used as he raced through Lexingto…

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